At the risk of being politically incorrect, I wish children (and adults) "respect" (or even fear) "someone", e.g. parents / teachers / god etc.
With no external influence telling children what is right and wrong, and threatening punishment (in the present life or afterwards), then we should not be surprised children think they can get away with murder.
Girls said murdering friend felt right, court told
The scary thing is there are also children raised in very moral homes where this takes place. Too much structure and morals can cause these types of behaviors as well. Too much of either isn't good.GG_Fan wrote:At the risk of being politically incorrect, I wish children (and adults) "respect" (or even fear) "someone", e.g. parents / teachers / god etc.
With no external influence telling children what is right and wrong, and threatening punishment (in the present life or afterwards), then we should not be surprised children think they can get away with murder.
I agree .. but I fear the environment we are in already veers too much to the "independence" side already where even mild chastisement for children is either illegal, or effectively illegal. I believe this makes kids think they are invincible and can do anything they like, especially when parents are too busy (or don't care) about instilling a moral compass into the children.Skylace wrote:The scary thing is there are also children raised in very moral homes where this takes place. Too much structure and morals can cause these types of behaviours as well. Too much of either isn't good.
There is something to be said for fear of god .. after all, the police aren't around everywhere, but if children believe god sees and knows everything ...
I don't agree that fear of God or anything for that matter is a good way to control someone or make them stay in line.GG_Fan wrote:I agree .. but I fear the environment we are in already veers too much to the "independence" side already where even mild chistisement for children is either illegal, or effectively illegal. I believe this makes kids think they are invincible and can do anything they like, especially when parents are too busy (or don't care) about instilling a moral compass into the children.Skylace wrote:The scary thing is there are also children raised in very moral homes where this takes place. Too much structure and morals can cause these types of behaviors as well. Too much of either isn't good.
There is something to be said for fear of god .. after all, the police aren't around everywhere, but if children believe god sees and knows everything ...
I do not have a fear in God or even a fear of the police. Instead I was raised to be responsible.
That is the biggest problem I see with our youth today. Plenty of them are scared or angry but they have no sense of responsibility. Someone else will take care of it or it's someone else's fault.
I even think that by giving kids too many changes in school it causes problems. Like one of the current policies that if a child doesn't turn in their work they don't get a zero for it. Instead they are given multiple chances to turn it in and are even given credit for the work the do turn in.
I think this sends a bad message to kids that they don't need to do the work to get credit. Then when they get older and have to pay bills or work they're going to think they have many chances to do these things.
We need to raise our children to use critical thinking skills and to be responsible and have the ability to admit when they are wrong and rejoice when they are right. Fear in something is not the answer to making someone behave.
There have been plenty of studies done that show fear doesn't work. Just look at death penalty studies. People are afraid of dying, but that doesn't deter them.GG_Fan wrote:I wish you were right, but I fear human nature is the opposite .. without fear of "something", society would break down.Skylace wrote:Fear in something is not the answer to making someone behave.
Furthermore, just go into a classroom, the best teachers with the most control don't use fear to control the class.
Fear is something we need to have to keep ourselves safe yes, fight or flight, but it isn't good for controlling people in the long run. It actually causes more problems. Just talk to abuse victims.
Since this forum is about what people personally belief, I personally believe we have sent a whole generation of children down the wrong track of morality .. Society has to do something, and I believe it should urgently instill a sense of what is good/bad into the kids, with associated fear if they don't follow it. The proof of the pudding is in the eating, and we have seen what is happenning to society : religious attendance down, crime up ..Skylace wrote:There have been plenty of studies done that show fear doesn't work. Just look at death penalty studies. People are afraid of dying, but that doesn't deter them.
Furthermore, just go into a classroom, the best teachers with the most control don't use fear to control the class.
Fear is something we need to have to keep ourselves safe yes, fight or flight, but it isn't good for controlling people in the long run. It actually causes more problems. Just talk to abuse victims.
And my personal belief is that you're wrong about the fear.GG_Fan wrote:Since this forum is about what people personally belief, I personally believe we have sent a whole generation of children down the wrong track of morality .. Society has to do something, and I believe it should urgently instill a sense of what is good/bad into the kids, with associated fear if they don't follow it. The proof of the pudding is in the eating, and we have seen what is happenning to society : religious attendance down, crime up ..Skylace wrote:There have been plenty of studies done that show fear doesn't work. Just look at death penalty studies. People are afraid of dying, but that doesn't deter them.
Furthermore, just go into a classroom, the best teachers with the most control don't use fear to control the class.
Fear is something we need to have to keep ourselves safe yes, fight or flight, but it isn't good for controlling people in the long run. It actually causes more problems. Just talk to abuse victims.
Oh well, we'll have to agree to disagree.
One way to pre-empt aggression and violence is to have a better understanding of the child, and by making it absolutely clear there will be punishment if they commit evil acts. Hopefully you would never need to actually punish the child .. in which case the warning worked in that it prevented the child committing the evil act. Indeed, if the fear is punishment from God in the after-life, the child won't experience aggression and violence on this earth, though some people fear God would punish them during their life-time.
