WHY I'M TERRIFIED OF GETTING MARRIED
By Victoria Kennedy
IT'S one of the longest engagements in showbiz. Gillian Taylforth accepted her fiance's proposal 16 years ago - but her wedding day still seems to be as far away as ever. In fact, her pals would be well advised not to bother buying a hat at all. "I'll be walking down the aisle with a Zimmer frame," 51-year-old Gillian laughs with her trademark throaty chuckle. Her partner Geoff Knight - who she's been with for 18 years - hasn't stopped trying to tie her down, though. Earlier this year, the 52-year-old businessman asked her if she wanted to finally set a date. She toyed with the idea - but now she's got cold feet. "We chatted about getting married and wondered when we should to do it," Gillian says. "It'll probably be another 18 years - I think if it ain't broke, don't fix it. When he mentioned it recently, I thought, 'Oh, that'll be nice,' and then I wasn't sure again. I think I'm frightened. I probably worry it'll change things. And anyway, once you've got children, you've made that commitment."
In truth Gillian, who became a household name when she played Kathy Beale in EastEnders, says it's a wonder they're engaged in the first place because the proposal didn't exactly go to plan. "It's a standing joke," she laughs. "He'd talked to me in the September about getting engaged, but then he didn't mention it again. His famous line was 'don't push a river, let it flow'. Then on Christmas Eve we had a row. He was supposed to be round at my house at 11pm. I'd organised some champagne, but then it got to midnight and I thought, 'blow it,' and opened the bubbly. So when he finally got to mine and we put the presents around the tree, I couldn't see a small box. So I thought, 'Well then, whatever.' That night I slept in the bed and he slept on the sofa. Then in the morning he gave me this big box, which had another box inside it, and then another little one inside with a ring in it. I opened it and gasped, 'Oh,' but he didn't say anything. So I put it on the wrong finger and he said, 'You're supposed to put it on your engagement finger.' I snapped back, 'You're supposed to ask me.' So that was it - we were engaged. So if that was the engagement, perhaps we should forget about a wedding!"
Even if Gillian did decide to set a date, she'd be hard-pressed to squeeze it into her schedule. The actress is returning to our screens in ITV1's The Bill as Sergeant Nikki Wright, a married mum of two. Gillian is currently working six days a week on the show. The set is a two-hour drive away from her home, so she leaves at 5.30am and doesn't usually return until 9pm. She's recently hired an au pair to look after her children, Jessica, 14, and Harrison, seven, during the day. And she admits to feeling guilty about not spending enough time with them.
"I leave so early I'm the alarm clock at home now. When I'm sitting in make-up I'll call them and say, 'This is your seven o'clock wake up call,'" she laughs. "It's hard being away from the kids. You're on a guilt trip as a working mum anyway. I told Harrison the other day I wouldn't get back in time to pick him up from school. He just said, 'Oh, OK,' and I felt guilt, guilt, guilt."
Gillian is excited today because she's just bought Harrison a pet tortoise called Tyke. But she says she consciously attempts not to make up for being away by showering her children with gifts. "I don't believe in thinking, 'I've been away so I'll buy them something.' I tend to overcompensate with cuddles. Jessica's at that age where she cringes but Harrison likes it and says, 'Give me a kiss 'cos I love you.'"
Despite the long hours and being away from her kids, Gillian is clearly delighted to be starring in The Bill. The seasoned actress, who was in Footballers' Wives, admits she had the jitters on her first day. "I was so nervous," she says. "However many jobs I've done, I always feel like the new girl. Some of the cast have been together for 22 years, I thought they might think I'm hopeless. And then there's the lovely uniform. Actually, it's not too bad, and at least I know what I'm going to wear every day. It was great wearing all those glam clothes in Footballers' Wives but it's nice to have a change."
Gillian says it's been strange being out in public in the full police get-up. "It's weird walking down the street in the uniform," she chuckles. As people look at me I can see them thinking, 'I know that face... no, it can't be because she's a copper.' One bloke stopped me and said, 'I never meet any policewomen like you, otherwise I wouldn't mind getting arrested.' He obviously needed his glasses, or he was drunk!"
Modest about her looks, the 5ft 6in actress weighs just under 9st and is slim and toned. Dismissing any compliments, she says: "I haven't been to the gym because I've been working so hard. I was thinking of putting a step machine in my dressing room because I don't have the energy to go to the gym for an hour."
On top of her family and work commitments, Gillian is also a supporter of the NSPCC's recent Full Stop campaign to help end cruelty to children. It's a subject she's passionate about. "Every child deserves the right to love and a happy childhood," she says. "If anyone reading this sees something amiss, don't ignore it - tell someone." With that, Gillian is off to see her own kids. "I told Harrison I could pick him up tonight and he was delighted," she says. "It's so good to be there for him."
JOIN the NSPCC's campaign at www.bethefullstop.com
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